I have a Mustache

"I will never grow a mustache."
-Me, just about every time I've seen a mustache on somebody my age.

Yet I am here now, writing a post about how I have a mustache. Does this make me a liar, or is this quote lacking context? I'm not a great fiction writer, so I'm hoping you don't think I've just been writing lies or have an inconsistent character, especially considering how heartfelt and sincere most of my posts are. Give me a chance to explain what I meant when I said the quote I opened with.

The full context of my quote up there goes something like "I will never grow a mustache. They look terrible for at least weeks while the attempt is happening, and all too often the result looks like a teenager proud of his first peach fuzz on his lip. If I wanted a mustache, I would have to simply not shave at all for a month and then shave down to a mustache." With all of the context, would I be a self-contradicting liar, or somebody that doesn't mind a facial-hair growing experience (with certain constraints)?

All too often the process of quoting somebody isn't done with pure intent. If I wanted to malign somebody that made a complex statement, I could take a portion of a statement that in context is a complete and rational thought and use it exclusively. If I then add some incorrect context, I could make the quote seem anywhere from foolish to downright evil. I am a mild mannered man, but I have to admit that this is a possibility in society and that I should be cautious of quotes or descriptions of somebody/something that comes from a potentially biased source.

So what is the point of this post? First, to announce a change of appearance to the people I haven't seen in a while that follow me here; my mustache has been around for months and isn't going anywhere fast. Second, to ask cynical naysayers to give things a chance. Something dear to my heart, which I've talked about extensively in previous posts and is the entire reason for this blog, is my religion. It sometimes gets flak for being what it is, but too often it is also criticized for untrue and unsubstantiated claims. If you have been turned away because of what you have heard from non-Mormon sources, don't be that person that believes the first bad thing said about somebody else. Ask a Mormon a question with the intent to learn.

Stay a while, and listen...

Stories make great blog posts. They are a chance to enter somebody's life for a short while and live an event, no matter how brief. So here is a story, nothing more than that. Except the news part, because this really happened today and it was exciting.

Brooms. Not my favorite.

I have been looking for a job so that I can have more financial security and know that I won't be a simple drain on my parent's finances. In the search I've had various twists and turns, including applying for a job without realizing I wouldn't be in the state for another two months and having one interview over the phone. My aim was to land a job in the computer division (it pays better, I like pushing mice better than pushing brooms, and it fits my resume better), but the interviews I got didn't pan out and anything is better than nothing and I was looking seriously at some janitorial positions when I got the call from the continuing education department about an application I sent in for a computer specialist.

"When can we set up an interview?"

"I'm available almost anytime, right now even if you were interested."

"Well, the interview is two parts but I think that should work for one of them."

"Great! I'll be there in 15 minutes."

I was already on campus for some summer classes, so I walked to where he was working and had a simple interview. He explained a few things about the position and asked me a few questions, along the lines of what things I can do. I confidently told him what I was able to do, we chatted a little bit, and he said he'd call me later about the second part of the interview.

I left excited, but a little worried I'd come off too confident or eager for the position. Evening came and went without a call, and since he had hinted at wanting to hire before too much longer I was planning on calling him sometime mid-morning or midday, but then I got a call around 10 in the morning asking me to come in around 12:30. Of course I accepted! I went home, made sure I was presentable and ready to go, ate lunch, and went to the meeting. My first time in a cubicle farm, I made my way to the back of the long room, had a brief chat with the interviewer's boss, then I was brought back to the interviewer's room and told to pull up my schedule on the computer. Simple enough. But this is where the fun began!

The computer was off, so I double checked the light and hit the power button. Nothing. Double check again, and then I check behind the computer. Hmm, the power cord isn't in. I turn to the other person in the office and ask, "Is this supposed to be unplugged?" 

"Hmm, nope, I guess you can plug it in." In goes the plug, and back to the power button. Easy, right? Except instead of showing anything on the screen, I get nothing and a clicking noise. Suspecting nothing, I turn to the interviewer and tell him something is wrong with the computer, and suddenly I understand.

"That's fine, we've got some spare parts if you need them."

This simple project of pulling up my schedule was a test to see if I could find and overcome some common, planted errors that will disrupt a work sequence. They already had the schedule I gave them when I applied, I was just getting a chance to prove the skills I said I had.

Not Actual Photo

So open up the case, look inside, and I immediately see a cable hanging unplugged. Plug that in, think I'm done, but then consider to look a bit more. Lo, there is a hard drive cable and power cord! 'Tis not proper for such to be laying about! So I located the hard drive, and after 5 minutes of trying to get access to it I got it out, plugged it in, and replaced it. Knowing there was more to check for, I looked through the case another time and saw that the RAM wasn't locked in, just placed in their slots. Alright, that was everything inside the case. I power it up, and happy there weren't any angry noises I was confronted with a screen without any input. So I check the connections of the video card and the cable, and was certainly relieved when it worked.

Then came a pause. I wasn't supposed to know it yet, but there was a network problem that prevented my supervisor from logging in with his credentials so he needed to find out what the local admin account was. Eventually that was sorted out, and welcomed by the windows screen I breathed a sigh of relief, opened up Chrome, and typed in my schools website.

Only I didn't type in my website. I typed in gibberish letters, every key leading to the wrong character. Anybody that has fallen pray to the second part of prank #7 will know what that means. While I didn't know immediately what to do, I found it and resumed my quest for my schedule. Only this time when I tried to go to the website, I got nothing but a "couldn't load page" error.

This was the low point of this test. I tried everything I could think of. Checking cables. Restarting the switch. Restarting the driver. ipconfig, ping, and IP addresses. From my research, I could tell I was connected to the network (I managed to bring up a connected printer by it's IP) so the switch and the connections were working, but I couldn't do it. After 15, 20 minutes (maybe it was less and I was just stressed) of flailing, I gave up and asked for help. After a grudging "I give up," he did a few tests, went into the settings for the device, and turned of the static, custom IP, which should only be used for certain reasons because otherwise it will do just what it was doing for me. After a mental "Duh, of course! I've even fixed this before for myself!" I got control back, once again ready to capture that elusive schedule!

Guess what? It didn't work. I mean, the network was working and I could get to the Internet, but upon trying to access the secure website we got a screen that was a lovely shade of red with a warning of an out of date security certificate. Fortunately, this was a quick fix that I have also had to do for a personal fix. A quick glance confirmed my suspicions, it was currently October 1st, 2016. Glad for the simplicity, I changed the clock and continued on my merry way, with my supervisor at my shoulder saying "And now we get to the hardest part." Expecting something, maybe a trap door with fire breathing crocodiles to open up or something, I got to the schedule to hear "That's a good looking schedule. Would you like to work for us?"

Yep, I just used a meme to express myself.

Everything after that can be summarized with "And then I did the paperwork part of getting hired." A process

I'm still going through, but I should be working before too long. In a word, "Yes."

For bonus points, read the title to this post again after you listen to this clip.

Followup, an End of Two Years and a Start of Some More

Nearly two and a half months ago, on the evening of May 24th, I once again was in Maryland. After two years serving in Montana for the Lord, I was done. And now I write something about it.

So what will become of this blog? I will continue to write, and post, and whatever I desire. If you are a stranger, stay a while and listen if you care but I do not write for you. If you are family or friend, you can likely learn what you're curious, but I guess I'm not really writing for you, either. I'll continue writing because I want to. I want to have a place to write my thoughts, and if I'm writing for a "public" audience than I'll be writing with more thought than if I were to solely keep a journal. So here I am, sending my voice into the Internet, one more blog talking into it.

Also, since I am not a full-time missionary and now the things I write, post, say, etc. are solely representing me, I will link things and quote people I didn't before.

Analysis of Awesome

Something I've said quite often in the past is that something is awesome. It can be in a variety of contexts, used to describe a person, an object, or an event. For me, it has some special meaning that takes it beyond the simple "throwaway" compliment it can become in some vocabularies. There was one point in my life that I really remember defining in my mind what it has come to mean to me.

The chore we were discussing was the dishes

One afternoon, my younger sister and I were talking. We have two more younger siblings, and since she was older and more responsible than they she was asked to do yet another chore (or so it felt to her). As we are all want to do at times, she complained a little at this extra duty and I happened to overhear her. I remembered times in my childhood that I was in the very same situation, given more chores because I was able, willing, and responsible enough to do them. I then said something like this: "[Sister,] you are awesome. Now I know that that word comes off as a kind of meaningless word, but I really mean it. You are doing the work that another is not. You are doing the hard thing. You are not shirking, and so you have been asked to do more. This extra work is not something demeaning, it is not an insult. It one of the truest compliments you can receive. You are being told that you are awesome every time you are asked to do more. So stand up tall, square your shoulders, and think not of the drudgery that is before you. Think of the awesome that is in you."

Awesome doesn't just mean "cool" or "neat." Awesome is the description of inspiring awe, being a better you, and surpassing the normal standards of the world around us. It should be our ultimate goal. In the end, this is what the gospel of Jesus Christ is about. Not restricting us, not punishing us for our misdeeds, and not whitewashing all of us to be the same shade. The gospel is about making us awesome with the help of Christ. We are given commandments to let us know what to avoid and what will help us. We can learn about why there are consequences for our actions, using the momentary pain of a mistake and acting to be better because of it. I testify of the power of change, of the love our Savior has for each of us, and how that means that we can be awesome. Be motivated, think of the potential that is in you, and don't back down!

Imperial March

Dun dun dun Dun dudun, Dun dudun!

You are watching a classic sci-fi film, and suddenly a familiar series of notes come on. You know what these notes mean; they are the sounds that accompany the main villain, the bad guy that sends shivers up your spine, the driving force of evil in the film. You can't do anything about it; you are a simple viewer, without impact to the way the story plays out. After all, the film has been filmed, the end was several decades ago, and you are there to enjoy events as they pass before your eyes.

Obviously, a movie is not what our life is like. We have the option of action, we are the self-controlled agents of our lives, and the end is yet to be seen. Also, we don't hear ominous motifs whenever something significant happens. Or do we? Is there something that can warn us of trouble, encourage us towards good, and change the mood of the scene? Have I led you in the right directions with questions yet?

There is definitely something (or rather someone) sent to help us in life. Our Father in Heaven loves us, and wouldn't want us to struggle blindly, so the Comforter has been sent to guide us. When he wants us to know that something is good we will be able to feel of the fruits of the Spirit found in Galatians 5:22-23, just as when the movie wants you to recognize the good guys. Likewise, the lack of these fruits or the presence of their opposites such as hate, misery, or confusion can warn us of bad situations just as the Imperial March warns us of the presence of Darth Vader. This concept is what Moroni asks us to listen to in Moroni 10:3-5, not just the words of well meaning yet human missionaries (like myself). Try it out!

Free Agency and Being Free as a Kite

Something that's a big deal is the perceived surrender of will that comes with being Mormon. This is because we have commandments, sometimes referred to as "all your little rules." It is true, we have a high standard that we strive to follow. We really do try to follow all the commandments mentioned in the previous link. Because some of these "rules" are contrary to what some people enjoy, feel strongly about, or simply habits, it seems as if we are restricting our freedom by following them.

If you are perceptive, you've noticed that I haven't agreed with the criticisms about curtailed freedom. I know full well that I have free agency (the ability to make choices); it is part of the plan that God has for us. I know that the lack of rules feels like freedom, but true freedom is having the rules, learning the consequences of the choices, and then making the choice. What seems like a little known secret is that it's not the Church that makes us follow the rules; it is, at the very core, ourselves that choose to follow the rules. So why would so many people give up things that are "fun" or "exciting?" I like to think about how kites work.

A kite is a heavier than air object, and the combination of wind flowing around it and a tether providing a counter force causes enough lift to cause a kite to fly. Every kite has a string attached, and so can only fly so high. Eventually every kite reaches its max height, restricted and blocked from further soaring because its string is held down. A concerned onlooker may see this, and feeling sorry for the kite desire that the string be broken, the kite freed to travel to whatever heights it can reach on its own. We'll say the onlooker's desire is met, and so the kite is freed. Does it fly to greater heights, no longer restricted? No, the removal of the tether instead causes the kite to flutter around a bit and quite quickly tumble to the earth.

Rules are similar tethers in our life; abiding by the rules restricts us from certain activities, and the idea of just being free from the things that bind us earthward is so appealing. However, the rules also guide us, allow us to react to winds of change with confidence and strength, and in the end a kite with a string will always fly higher and longer than a kite without. I know that you have your agency and you can choose for yourself what to do, but I know that I've felt so much more empowered, so much more successful, and so much more happy when I know that I am following the commandments. Don't be afraid to change simply because it feels like you are tying a string to your kite; it could be the string that lets you soar.

An Answer to Every Question

I was reading in last December's Ensign and I found an article that I thought was interesting. The title is what caught my attention, An Answer for Every "What If".  It appealed to my desire for some universal statement that can cover all sorts of situations, and it certainly started to. The author uses the Atonement to answer questions about "what if [something bad] happened?" The Atonement of Jesus Christ is the most amazing and powerful event that has ever happened on this planet, and it covers every injustice and injury possible. The Atonement can, if you let it, answer every "why me?" or "what if...?" question bringing you down.

He will fix all injustices and uncertainties

However, there are also other questions we might have. We might not understand the "Why...?" or the "How...?" or any number of things. This is a fine place to be! Having a question is part of the process of gaining knowledge. If we have a question, asking an authority will get us the answer. For instance, if we want to know the amount $100 from today would be equivalent in 1801 we could ask a data-bank instead of asking a stranger or somebody not trained to know the answer. Questions are best answered from a trustworthy source. However, all human based information has the potential for error. Representatives might be biased towards their company, any human can make a mistake, and even data-banks could have erroneous information. I sometimes wonder, where can we go to find a trustworthy source?

This is something that I, as a stranger (or even if you actually know me) on the other side of the Internet, cannot answer definitively for you. You are currently reading the words of a representative of my church, and I said earlier that representatives might be biased. This is why I put so much emphasis on reading the Book of Mormon and praying to know if it's true. While I cannot give you perfect knowledge, the Holy Ghost can and will. Moroni teaches this very principle; in Moroni 10:3-5 he exhorts everybody to ask to receive knowledge (I talked about these scriptures in a series of posts a while back). I especially like the shortest of those three verses: "And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things." If there is anybody you can trust, it is God, who speaks through the Holy Ghost. He is the most trustworthy source of information possible, and if you sincerely desire, also the most available source. So, give it a try! What is there to lose (besides some time)? Or, more importantly, what is there to gain (measureless joy in this life and the next)?

Birthdays

The celebration of the day one is born is a big deal to some people in some cultures. I know that my family has used it as a time to celebrate the person, celebrate the good they have done in our lives and let them know how much we love them. I've always thought this was just the way things went; for my siblings birthdays I would compliment them, give gifts to them, do some of their chores, etc. On my birthday, I'd enjoy the displays of love that I'd receive. I think this is a rather standard view on birthdays, a day of self indulgence and joy.

A birthday cake, the universal symbol of growing older and having fun

One December birthday, while celebrating my father's birthday, my dad did something that changed how I think about birthdays. It was my dad's day; we kids were trying to be nice to each other, by good to our mother, and making my dad's day worthy of being called as such. Then, at the birthday party where everybody was gathered (including my grandma, his mom), my dad produced a bouquet of flowers to give to my grandma. He then proceeded to thank her for all the things she had done in his life, not the least of which was giving him life. After all, we didn't do all that much on our first birthday; it was almost all our mother's work.

This act of humility, of taking something I had been taking for granted and looking at the source of the blessing, will forever make me think of the things my mom has done for me. My birthday, while certainly a fun time to hear well wishes, is a time to thank those around me, to thank my mom, but to also thank my God. I am thankful for my life, both its basic existence and also for the bountiful blessings I've experienced. I am grateful for the many reminders I have of my own inadequacies, and the chance I have, through Christ and His Atonement, to perfect myself and become a better person. My birthday was yesterday, but every day I have the chance to be thankful, be humble, and be faithful. I hope you use your time to look for the good things, and then your life will be filled with them.

GIGO and Miracles

GIGO is an acronym, used most commonly with computers and programming. It stands for Garbage In, Garbage Out, and is a way of understanding the fact that a computer will process any data it is given, even if it is completely wrong, and process it into something else that is completely wrong. Just as 1.05x12000 is wrong if you forget the 0's, neglecting something on the input side through an erroneous entry or lack of care will cause the output to be deficient.

So that is what GIGO is. What is a miracle? It is an instance where "Some lower law [is] superseded by the action of a higher." It shouldn't be thought of as something that happens only once in a while; higher law has more effect than lower does on an everyday basis. To illustrate this, consider an airplane. By legislative law, an pilot must make landings that pose no harm to its cargo. However, if the natural law is not followed that allows a pilot to land a plane safely, the legislative law has no affect on the plane and the natural law enforces its consequences. In this case, the lower law is the legislative law and the higher law is the natural law; the lower has no effect on whether the higher happens or not.

Miracles happen similarly. As we follow higher laws of concentrating on uplifting thoughts, following commandments, and exercising faith, the miracles will follow as readily as dropping something is followed by it falling. However, if we neglect to follow the higher law we will fail to realize the miracles that could have happened. Did that last sentence sound similar to the first paragraph? GIGO has a greater application than just computers. It can also be applied to relationships, mechanics, and even miracles. So, when you feel as if God isn't speaking with you, consider this application: are you giving your effort to take part in the miracle that is personal revelation? Or are you expecting the program to somehow give you the correct information when you fail to input the full equation? In order to learn if the Book of Mormon is true, you need to put in your effort if you expect anything to come of it. I have put in my effort, and I can tell you that I have witnessed the results. Now it's your turn.

Canoes and Crows

As a youth, I was fortunate enough to enjoy several "aquatic excursions" on the rivers found in the mid-northern Appalachians. These have ranged from simple tubing trips down a creek or a river, to whitewater rafting with multiple intense moments. One particular trip involved a mild river, traveled with the aid of canoes. It was a shallow river, and several of our group wound up on rocks and tipped their boat as a result of it. Fortunately, my boat never did force us to test our floatation devices, but I would be a fool if I took the credit for that.

I've always lacked a bit of coordination in a boat. Most of that is because I've lacked coordination on land; I simply do not consciously control every place my body is. I can paddle hard and use my strength, but if I'm not careful that very strength is what tips me over. So, if I where placed in a canoe all by myself I would have been swimming down half that river. Instead, I had the help of another that was much better at boating. It was him that would guide the canoe, dodging rocks and finding channels. I would listen for his instructions, and then do my very best to follow them, be it paddle hard, back paddle left, switch sides, etc. Because of the teamwork, we were able to reach the end of the trip and take an enjoyable swim (instead of a forced one). This entire experience reminds me of a poem, About Crows by John Ciardi.

The old crow is getting slow; 
the young crow is not.
Of what the young crow does not know,
the old crow knows a lot.

At knowing things, the old crow is still
the young crow's master.
What does the old crow not know? 
How to go faster.

The young crow flies above, below, and rings
around the slow old crow.
What does the fast young crow not know?
WHERE TO GO.

I was like that young crow. I knew how to paddle hard and so we were able to speed past some obstacles. However, I didn't know where to paddle or which direction would keep us safe. My boat-mate did. The only reason we were able to get to the end was because we combined our abilities; I wasn't proud in my strength, and he didn't try to go by himself. In our daily lives, we need to remember that we are imperfect. Sometimes we are the young crow, full of talent or ability but not yet wise. We need to listen to the old crows, those that know more than we do and instruct us. Those leaders, family members, or perhaps wise friends may have greater wisdom than we do and can help us best us our strengths and abilities. Of course, their are plenty that don't have the same wisdom we do; it to these that we need to be the old crows, guiding those we are able to and helping them rise to their potential. I know that as we strive to be better, both in accepting help and helping others, we can all get down the river of life with minimal swimming trips.

Opposition, Wrestling, and Training

When I wrestled, my usual weight class was 189. This is the 3rd heaviest weight class in high school, and so I was a good deal larger and stronger than most of my teammates. If I wanted an easy match-up for practice, I could choose the 112 or even 145, and I'd be able to go through practice hardly breaking a sweat while my foe would be straining, trying to move more mass than he ever would need to in a match. However, we didn't get to choose our practice partners. Our coach would pair us up with whoever he wanted us to, and for me that was quite often our heavyweights (which could weigh up to 285). In these practices, I'd be the one pushing hard and straining to move mass greater than I normally would be called on to endure. This might not seem fair, but the fact that I normally practiced with heavier opponents allowed me to be stronger and more prepared for match day. This is the greatest reason we have for why opposition is so crucial in this life; having more required of us allows us to grow more and to become stronger for it.

A simple illustration of the match-ups

That makes enough sense. If our life is a time to grow, then we'll be given exercises and practices that will expand our abilities, test our skills, and develop our characters. So why does life seem so unfair at times? Even when we have the comfort that our trials will be for our benefit, it is still no fun to go through them. Let me share with you another wrestling trial: since my wrestling team was short a few members, I would often wrestle up a class; while still weighing in at 189 or less, I'd wrestle those in the 215 weight class. On match day, not just during practice, I'd be put up against somebody heavier and (often) stronger than I was. This is no longer time to grow and develop, a practice with no affect on my record; I was simply having a match that was tougher than those around me and that I didn't feel prepared for. Our trials in life often look like this; we are under-prepared, under-weight, under-skilled, and we don't have the freedom of mistakes that comes with practice. How can we grow when we are in such an predicament?

It is these instances that we learn what we can't anywhere else. In my matches, I learned endurance, humility, and occasionally self-confidence. In life circumstances we learn similar things; endurance through trials, humility to trust in the Lord, and self-confidence when we finish our trial. In every match I wrestled up, I was able to go in with confidence and cheer because I knew that simply winning wasn't all; if I could resist the pin, I'd help my team with points. If I failed, I could learn to be better next time. Life's trials might not be changed simply by how we feel when we go into them, but we will be changed by our approach to difficult times.

Canon and Zombies and Scripture

Another zombie, with a different
requirement for destruction

A little while ago, another online missionary (which means he also has a blog and a Facebook) wrote a post about zombies that I highly recommend reading, especially if you are a well cultured and interesting person. After reading that (or before) I'd invite you to go about halfway down the post and read something he said: "There's two ways to kill a zombie: Crush the body or remove the head. It's as simple as that." The purpose of today is to expound on this statement, and perhaps why it's not quite as simple as that.

The simple reason it's not so simple can be summed up with the word "canon." In fiction, the canon is the official rules, occurrences, people, and facts of the related works. So, when Elder Whitlock referred to the two ways to kill a zombie, he was drawing from a certain canon wherein the rules were as such. On the other hand, I normally draw my zombie canon from the works of Max Brooks, which includes the Zombie Survival Guide. This work of fiction (we hope) has extensive details into the hows and whys of zombies, and I personally think it is a great read. However, the canon for this book is that the only way to kill a zombie is to destroy the brain (if the head is simply removed, it can still bite). This is a clear and obvious difference of opinion, which can easily be resolved by saying the canon is different and going our different ways. That is perfectly fine in the world of fiction. This is not quite as easy to say in the world of religion.

Canon is classically used to describe what is official in a church (be it Catholic, Ecclesiastic, and sometimes Mormon). This extends to the holy scriptures; what is canon is accepted as truth, while what is not canon just doesn't carry the same weight. What do Mormons consider canon? The simple answer can be found in the Articles of Faith numbers 8 and 9, which I'll summarize here: the Book of Mormon, the Bible (correctly translated), and the continuous revelation given by God's prophets are canon. We believe in an open canon, not confined to the pages of books written in the past, just as the Apostles of old and the original Christians did (if they didn't, where did the New Testament come from?). I testify to you, humble reader, that this canon, and the Church it supports, has blessed my life and will bless yours. As I've suggested before, give it a read and try it out yourself.

The Choice of Faith

The topic on my mind lately has been an interesting one, and something that I think is rather difficult to talk about. It has to do with the thought "how do I know I'm right?" It stems from my natural tendency towards skepticism. When new information is presented to me, I first disbelieve it before accepting it. If I have a new idea, I second guess myself. If I see new research, I feel like it will be a while before it's useful. If I hear a conspiracy theory, I'll doubt it. And yet I present myself before the world, saying that I know the Book of Mormon is true. This brings us back to the previous question: "how do I know I'm right?"

Questions. I have a few.
But I don't let that stop me.

The skeptic in me would like to say that nobody can truly know of personal correctness. However, then I would dwell in an unfortunate state of not knowing what to trust, and that is not acceptable to me. The truth is, having faith is a choice, just as not having faith is a choice. This I can do. I can choose which influences that I receive, either internal (my thoughts, my doubts, my conclusions) or external (what I read, what I hear, what I feel), and I can choose which ones can convince me. I have chosen to place the highest priority on the spiritual witness I have received, or the powerful feelings of peace, joy, and certainty that I receive from following through with my responsibilities in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Because I've given these experiences priority, I don't let other things (such as controversial history, angry shouts, or moments of confusion) have an effect on me. Even my existential doubts have lower priority.

I have sometimes wondered that maybe I'm "drinking the Kool-Aid," or blindly following something I haven't completely proven to myself. If the fact that I choose in this world to trust something I've never seen before seems weird to you, I invite you to to consider the following. Consider the happiness that I enjoy when I think about Christ and His church on the earth today. Consider how you feel right now. If I, with all my skepticism and worry that I might be wrong, can say that this is true, that I have received more joy from following the principles and ordinances of the gospel, and that I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is God's kingdom restored on the earth, what is to stop you? Do you want to have joy? I know you can overcome your doubts, your questions, your angst. I know because I have felt the Holy Ghost testify to me of truth and I have chosen to listen, and I have overcome my doubts, my questions, and my angst. The Bible says "by their fruits ye shall know them" (Matthew 7:16,20). Well, this joy and peace is mine.

Enduring to the End and Power Stance

For the newcomers, I wrestled in high school. I still think it is one of the great contests of skill and strength, even after the intervening time that I've been able to play basketball and other popular sports with fellow missionaries. I also still think it has some of the greatest teaching opportunities. I remember one wrestling match I had, against another team with a history of winning and the specific guy I was against was ranked much higher than I was. This story will involve some terms specific to wrestling, and to save space here I will direct you to an article on the rules.

Amazingly, I was able to get ahead during the first two (of three) periods and most of the third. Not only was I ahead, but I had three points on this guy and I was feeling good. There was only 30 seconds left, and we were both on our feet. Since the guy I was wrestling had much more experience than I did (I had at most one year and he surely had three or four years, if not more, under his belt), winning by a small margin would be all I could hope for. I didn't need any more points, and if I got too adventurous I could easily have put myself in disadvantageous position and maybe even have gotten pinned. All I needed to do was endure without making a mistake, but also not retreat (that's called stalling and costs points). I needed to "power stance."

A standard wrestling match for me

Power Stance is what my coaches would tell us to keep pushing, be aggressive and make your foe understand that you aren't done, but don't do anything that might compromise your win. It takes power and endurance in the last period, and is not easy. You are tired, you've just used all of your strength and agility to get ahead, and after everything is left on the mat you need to leave a bit more. It might be the hardest thing you've ever done, yet it is essential to keep going in order to win.

Unfortunately for my record, I did not power stance properly. I was overconfident and my foe took advantage of a foot that slipped too far and I was too weak in bringing it back. He took me down, and even got near to pinning me, and in those last 30 seconds I gave up 5 points and lost the match. I now look back, and though I know that that one match wouldn't have changed too much of my life I still wish I could have endured a little bit better.

All of us have the opportunity every day to endure, be it well or not. Our life is much like a wrestling match, one where we are ahead at the start and as we apply Christ's grace into our lives. However, we are still constantly under attack, and if we slip up we are always in danger of falling under the influence of Satan. We too need to use a "power stance," or a certain method of aggressively protecting ourselves from his attacks. As we listen to the words of God, found in scripture or the words of His prophets, we will be educating ourselves as to how to power stance. As we apply the things we learn, we'll be properly holding the power stance. And as we execute the power stance all the way to the end of our life, we will hear those blessed words: "Well done, thou good and faithful servant" (Matthew 25:21).

Ordinances and Ordnance

My brother, me, and a big bullet

Ordnance is a term for military hardware used to hurt other military things. More accurately, it refers to military equipment in a general sense, but I came to learn of it through the US Army Ordnance Museum while it was in Aberdeen, MD. Thus, my early exposure to ordnance involved tanks. Tanks and bombs and coastal defense guns that shot shells longer than I am tall. It was a treasured opportunity to walk around, read the plaques that were up, and just see the awesome that is in modern military power. Of course, it also afforded my mom a time to send the kids out of the house with my dad and have a relaxing Mother's Day afternoon.

Ordnance can cover many things, ranging from the things that shoot to the things that are shot, the things that move to the things that keep them moving. It is a broad term, and if you are like me and fascinated by things that explode it can hold your interest for a while.

An ordinance is a term used in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints quite often to refer to the sacred rituals including the Sacrament, Baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost. They require a proper authority, or the priesthood, in order to be performed correctly and be valid. This authority can only be confirmed by the laying on of hands by one who currently holds that authority, and was restored to Joseph Smith through the same method.

Ordinances can also cover many things, from weekly Sacrament to sacred Baptism. They are the keys to eternal life. They are what separate the true church of Jesus Christ from others, because of the authority that is required. They are the biggest change available to you today and can bless your life with peace, happiness, and comfort that comes with following Christ.

The biggest similarity between these two words is the sound. Ordinance has a single extra letter. Yet with that extra letter it also carries such importance. Don't take my word for it; read the Book of Mormon and ask to know if it's true. God would only reveal such a document to somebody called to do so; acceptance of the Book of Mormon is acceptance of Joseph Smith as a prophet and the LDS Church as the true church of Christ on the earth. I've learned this for myself, and I know I am a happier person because of it. Now it can be your turn.

That Time of the Year

For the past month, maybe even two for some, we have been hearing about Christmas. It is an incredibly exciting time of the year, full of increased media attention, sales, releases, and family. I love it! When I think of Christmas, I think of the fun times I've had with my family, the delicious food I've eaten, and the eventful stories I've been a part of (what childhood is complete without a flaming santa hat or Christmas dinner on the floor?). At the same time, I would be remiss if I didn't talk about what the Christmas celebration should be about as well as what it tends to be about.

I have often heard that we need to "remember the reason for the season." I agree, but I also want to emphasize a different angle than the standard birth of Jesus idea. I want to talk, rather, on the life of Jesus instead. Christmas is a wonderful celebration not because it's the celebration of our Saviors birthday but because it's a celebration of our Savior. Christ came to the earth, to "[descend] below all" (Doctrine and Covenants 122:8) so that he could raise us up at the last day. The best gift to all the earth, the Atonement, is the reason for the season!

The best part is that we can definitely keep this reason alive in our hearts throughout the year. Acts of service, following His commandments, and reading the scriptures. These are all ways to "feel the Christmas spirit" of Christ. I love the Christmas season, and more than that I love the Spirit I feel as I follow Christ. If you want to learn more about my beliefs in Christ, check out the Jesus Christ portion of mormon.org.

For the Beauty of the Earth

Hymn 92 in our hymnbook is For the Beauty of the Earth, a lovely song that reminds us of being thankful, of how beautiful the world we live in is, and of the universe as well. Today I wanted to talk about that beauty, and the many different kinds I've seen already in my life.

A view in Utah

My brother, fishing in a local river

I grew up in Maryland, living in three different towns over the course of about 18 years. I've also gone to school in Utah, and I've served in two different towns in Montana and Wyoming for the past 6 or so months. I can say that I've enjoyed being in every single one of those places. Each town, city, or area has beauty that makes me appreciate this wonderful earth a little more. For example, living in Havre de Grace, MD allowed me to enjoy being around trees and water almost constantly. Moving to Forest Hill gave me a chance to see the more rural area of the same county, as well as enjoying the close effect that hills and trees combined create. While Utah wasn't nearly as green, it did have mountains and views that lasted more than 2 or 3 miles. It was amazing, and something I hadn't seen before.

A Montana sunset I captured

Now I'm serving in Montana and Wyoming. When people hear I'm from Maryland, I often hear "You're a long way from home!" or "Oh, it's beautiful out there!" or something else. To these, I say that it's only a few thousand miles from home or I say that it's beautiful here, too. I've seen gorgeous sunsets, beautiful mountains, and my first double rainbow. I am so thankful for the beauty that surrounds us every day. I love this earth, and I'm happy to be on a mission. Please, take some time to enjoy the sites around you. If you have time afterwards, ask me about what else helps me to see beauty all around me, and I'll gladly talk about the truths that provide me with an eternal perspective.

What I Am Thankful For: Big Things

This last week (since Tuesday, up to Today) I've been saying things I'm grateful for. I've mentioned silly things, such as celery, and serious things, such as modern technology. I am thankful for each of the things I've mentioned, as well as many other things, but today I'd like to be thankful for the truly life changing things that come from my membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

I am thankful for the prophet Joseph Smith Jr. I am grateful for the faith and endurance that he showed and that God used to restore the true church again on the earth. I am also grateful for the early Church members, that suffered at the hands of others and that endured anyway and so built the foundation for the Church that I am a member of. I am grateful for the prophets and leaders that have since led us under Christ's direction. I am grateful for the history that has led up to me being here today.

I am grateful for the truths that I know. I am grateful for the revelations given to the living prophets and prophets of the past that help me understand my place in the universe, and tell me how I can best fulfill my purpose in life. I'm grateful for the knowledge of what my purpose in life is, and that it is good! I'm grateful for a religion that makes logical sense as well as spiritual sense.

I am grateful for a Brother that loves me perfectly. I am grateful that I have the opportunity to follow Him, and that He has opened a way that I can return to Heavenly Father. In the end, this is the truest thing to be grateful for. This I know, that I am eternally grateful to Christ for his infinite atonement. I hope you want to feel this joy as much as I love feeling it, and that you'll give the gospel, which has brought me so much joy, a chance in your life. Talk with missionaries, and start an amazing change in your life!

Try the links I've included. Most will take you to a place that will explain my word choice. Also, Mormon.org is a great website for explaining mormon related questions!

What I Am Thankful For: Modern Conveniences

Today is not Thanksgiving, and by some counts it is simply Christmas season. That's fine with me and my current blog series of thanks, for what greater thing do we have to be thankful for than Christ? Granted, I have only a limited ability to continue the same subject, but for a few days at least I'll be able to continue writing.

Something I've alluded to previously is that I'm thankful for the Internet, the vast series of connections between computers that allows me to write a blog entry and be read within moments by somebody days (walking distance) away. This is only one aspect of a world with incredible advancements in technology; not only can I share my testimony with you (who almost certainly isn't standing behind me) but we also have better materials, better education, and better entertainment than we did decades ago. I am grateful that I have the chance to grow up with pictures of the earth at night to enjoy as a youth and not just gazes at the stars.

About 11 years old, and still amazing to see. Source

I have grown up with conveniences that pioneers never could have imagined. Also, I have grown up with conveniences that pioneers made possible. It is impossible to be truly grateful with what I have today without being grateful for those that made it possible. I'm not a history buff, but I know that looking to our yesterdays allows us to appreciate our todays. I am also thankful for my God, who loves his children and has a plan in place to best help them. Remember as you go through your week, to "give thanksgiving daily" (Alma 34:38) for He really does send us blessings. This I know, and I am grateful for the idea a relative gave me to blog about being grateful.

What I Am Thankful For: Fun Activities

Every family has different things that they love to do with each other. I've heard of massive football games that come from family reunions around the holidays, and I've heard of board games, puzzle adventures, book reading, and many others. I may have mentioned my parents' love of certain geeky subjects, and that has affected what we do as well. My personal love of computers comes largely from my dad, and how he'd share his time with us in the form of either playing with us or letting us watch him as he played the games. We'd also play video games with each other; we hardly had a video-game in the house that we couldn't split screen with each other. Sometimes we'd get into conflicts over the games, but because that was against the goal of having games we would then lose gaming privileges and do something else instead.

Some people that put their picture on a Wiki site,
enjoying some good split screen fun.

A piece of modern revelation that we have received is the Family Proclamation. One of my dad's favorite line involves the fact that "wholesome recreational activities" are important for family unity. However, he points out that "work" comes before fun. It is good to have fun, to enjoy the time we have with our family, as long as we remember to not focus on the fun more than the work. I'm grateful for parents that love me, and for their example of work and fun that they have been to me.